Curiosity of adolescents and Internet exposures of adults

Source: Carl Pickhardt, Ph.D.

Source: Carl Pickhardt, Ph.D.

Comparable to the industrial revolution by generating major social changes, the Internet revolution has nonetheless had an impact, particularly on the curiosity of adolescents: “With my computer, I can learn about anything I want to know.

Perhaps in the parent’s youth, when a young person asked an unwelcome question about an adult experience, they may have been told, “Wait until you’re more adult, and then we’ll talk about it.” “Gone are those days. Farewell delay. Now young people have immediate access to the Internet 24 hours a day to satisfy the call of curiosity. A “Wild West” of information and disinformation is just a click away.

Restrict internet access

Sometimes parents decide to limit this exposure by monitoring or restricting internet activity, disabling or prohibiting travel on home devices where they don’t want youngsters teenager to go. They do this to protect their daughter or son from what they see as dangerous exposure to all sorts of harmful influences, whether it’s sites dealing with violence, hate, sex, drugs, gambling, meetbreaking the law, cults, conspiracy, or anything else relatives fear“We don’t want that kind of information coming into our house.”

The internet has dramatically widened the growing playing field, challenging traditional parental oversight in the process. Around college, it’s when more worldly curiosity often takes flight; The internet is where many discoveries happen. Certainly, parents can feel free to impose restrictions on internet travel and activity that are consistent with their principles and beliefs. However, at most they only have some local influence since they cannot control their teen’s access and activity on friends’ computing devices or on devices they can access elsewhere.

Better than restriction

What should a parent do? Parents must accept the reality of today’s availability and immediacy of information. They should treat any adolescent research or online experience that they find disturbing as an opportunity to discuss and provide education. Parents should help evaluate anything that is said electronically to the youngster and be open to following where the youngster’s curiosity leads them. When a teenager accesses the Internet earlier than their parents would like, it is important to discuss how to assess this online exposure and information.

Their advice to their teen might go like this: “Although it is tempting to believe the content and follow the advice given on the Internet, it is best to evaluate it first. So let’s talk about what you’ve been told and what to watch out for, because every website is posted with an agenda, to influence your thinking or action. Therefore, always ask yourself, “Why would anyone want to publish this information, what am I being asked to believe, what response am I expected from me and why?”

Internet exhibitions

If an adult is exposed to the Internet who reveals that their young teenager is watching what their parents disapprove of or which is prohibited, such as pornography, on his computer, parents must first assess their own emotional reaction. If they feel shocked, horrified, disgusted, or angry and are inclined to act that way, they need to calm down emotionally enough to talk about the experience reasonably and effectively. Expressing fear, criticism, disappointment or anger reduces the likelihood that useful communication will occur.

A simple rule for dealing with prohibited or unwanted Internet exposure is: calm down before communicating. Take a break. Breathe deeply. Take yourself to a quiet place. Maybe talk to a friend first. Take a moment to appreciate what you love about your child. Take the time to prepare yourself to listen, learn and speak.

Let the worst fears reign and you risk letting the expression of your upset interfere with your child’s education: “I have made my sense of offense the center of our communication. Instead of talking and finding out what was experienced and learned, I totally shut it down.

Pornographic exposure

Young viewers need the help of an adult to assess their Internet experience, to see what it is, what it is not, and what it is really meant for. For example, consider Internet porn exposure, which is increasingly common in middle school age. As suggested, I think it’s best to treat unwanted or disapproved internet exposure as a talking point to open up discussion, not a time to criticize or punish them, which will only shut down communication.

So, after emotionally recollecting yourself, simply state, “In general, I want us to be able to share our days in two ways: on our offline day and on our online day as well. Existing in two worlds of experience has made life more complicated for both of us that way, so there’s a lot more to follow now. Since you have acted of age to want to look at this kind of Internet offer, I would like you to also be of age to agree to discuss it with me. I’m not here to change your mind, just to give you my point of view.

If so, what might such a statement of perspective include? First, parents can indicate how sexual curiosity is normal, just like sexual thoughts and feelings are normal. What pornography shows are naked people having sex, so to that extent it is visually informative.

Then parents can explain how pornography is designed to work, such as how it’s intended for sexual entertainment, not sexual instruction – to generate interest, not to express accuracy. It is for enlightenment, not for education. It pretends and distorts more than it accurately informs. He portrays sex as sensual pleasure, not to create emotional closeness. This makes any type of sexual treatment acceptable and ignores abuse. This can make unprotected sex seem okay. He treats people more like sex objects than human beings. This makes human relationships mostly focused on sex and nothing else. It can portray exploitative and harmful sex as normal and consensual. What may seem OK may not seem OK. In this sense, pornography is for fancy, not reality. At worst, pornography featuring children and underage gamers is coercive, exploitative and destructive: “These vulnerable young people are often deeply hurt.”

The parenting challenge

Whenever you see that unwanted Internet exposure has occurred in your teen’s life, now is the time to encourage communication, not voice criticism or give punitive corrections. Parents today need to keep teenage internet life, with all its complexities, open for discussion at all times, and also share their growing online experience, for better or for worse. More than that, there is this:

For teens drawn to a more mundane experience, life online is irresistible. internet, virtual reality, social networksand computer games have sparked an evolutionary explosion of human creativity, breaking historical boundaries. Honorably captivated, now enthusiastic youngsters often lead the thrilling path to the Chopped off edge of change. Somewhat behind, parents can sometimes feel mixed, wanting their teen to follow emerging possibilities while worrying about the risk of harm. What to do?

In advanced cases, what may work best is to treat your adventurous teenager like an instructor: “You’re learning so much that I don’t know. Could you take me sometimes? Could you show me what I can’t appreciate and don’t know “don’t you understand?”

Becoming a teenage teacher of ignorant parents can be a trusting role to fulfill, while becoming a student of your teenager can help keep parents properly informed.

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